2B: Cracking the Shell

You don't need superpowers to be invisible.

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/2012/12/11/quantum-stealth-invisibility-hyperstealth_n_2277394.html

I'll be honest, back in high school I was nobody. I was never good at making friends or keeping them. I tried my hardest to blend in, and it worked. I was a gust of wind that nobody bothered to acknowledge. Nobody disliked me (that I knew of), but no one really liked me either. I was the epitome of indifference. I lived like a shadow cast down on the tile floor of the hallway, and for a while I was fine with that. Until one day I asked myself the question: Who is my best friend? I couldn't come up with a name. I had plenty of acquaintances and people I used to be close to, but we grew our separate ways. I ended up growing in an isolated field alone.

The problem with high school is that you are stuck with the same people. There were 200 kids in my grade and we had all known each other for years. There was no opportunity to expand your social group because it had been established in middle school. Your surroundings never changed even if you changed yourself. Before I began college last week, I decided that I was going to crack open the shell of my cocoon and morph into a social butterfly. 

I've been a shy person for as long as I can remember, so this transition is going to be difficult. I am not living in the delusion that I will suddenly be able to walk up to anyone and become his or her new best friend immediately, but I am going to try and change my introverted ways slowly but surely. 

My goal for this semester is to try and make at least one friend in every class. I am going to put myself out there and reach out to new people if it kills me (which it very well may). The process will commence with simple conversations about originating towns, prospective majors, and the weather, but my ultimate goal for the near future is to meet a kindred soul to share the college experience with. Thus far my project has been going well. I am on the path to becoming a new person. I have acquaintances in just about all of my classes (some of whom I can foresee having a possible relationship with). This new course of action has taught me that I don't have to settle for a life of solitude. In my own erratic mind, I am essentially removing my bullet proof vest and throwing myself to the wolves. There is a good chance I will grow to care for someone and they will  end up hurting me, but with reward comes risk. If I refuse to open up there is no opportunity for success, and I will only be hurting myself. I will try not to let my fear of the unknown stop me from living my life. With this progression, I am carefully shedding my coat of invisibility and embracing the new me.